TTYL8R, RU OK? UR MY BFF: Creating a Society of Morons!

Whoever invented text messaging should be shot! I think it is the number one cause of communication breakdown in our society. Over Christmas I got 6 "Merry Christmas" text messages. Nice gesture, but damn is it that hard to just pick up the phone and blurt it out for a whole 2 minutes? I think text messaging is a complete and utter cop-out and let's people excuse themselves from REAL communication. It basically says, "I have just thought about you for 30 seconds and I really don't want to talk to you, but hey it's the thought that counts--right?"

On Wednesday I took my niece and nephew to the mall. Yes, I know--brave and selfless. Anyhow, they both got new phones from Xmas and the entire ride there and for some of the duration of our visit-- there was the constant beep, beep, beep of incoming and outgoing text messages. I finally put a stop to it, but not once did these kids utter a word to their preteen mutants. It was ridiculous. God only knows that they were sending (probably Aunt Sunny has a fat ass) and if I were a parent there is no way my kids would be allowed to be sending these uncensored, unmonitored, God knows what--never ending-secretive-meaningless-misspelled-blurbs.

Sure let's help all the morons who can't spell as it is create their own language. That's what I would want for my child. No need to spell it properly or even feel as if you must speak, just send it in a text message--that's good enough. What the fuck is wrong with this world? Why are we allowing this ignorant form of laziness to surpass the necessary traditional means of conversation and communication?

I asked my niece if she ever goes over to her little girlfriends house and just hang out. This is exactly what she said, "Not too often Aunt Sunny, we just text." It made me sick. What happened to slumber parties and going to your "BFF's" house just to talk about the boys in school? I saw something on 20/20 last night that stated that more than 7 million people have clicked on the moronic site You Tube to watch this ugly little kid sing a song about chocolate, then this little monster got a commercial deal with Dr. Pepper and appeared on talk shows. It was absolutely ridiculous and if I were one of America's millions of enemies I would be doing just as they are.....LOL at what misfits we have become.

R U ABLE 2 TLK? I think so. Where is the sophistication? Where is the expression? Where is the passion in your voice and sincerity in your eyes? What if I am not telling the truth? Fuck it..no need, I'll send a text message.

Proud to be an American....NOT!

Well hello friends! I know it has been some time since I tapped my little fingers on the keyboard, but as with all of you--the holidays exhausted any free time. But, I am back and have a whole lot of new things to share so I hope you all will find the time to say hello and flatter me with your correspondence.

So, my thought for today is as follows: How in the world can people maintain professional jobs and be so damn incompetent? I had an appointment this morning with someone at 9 A.M. Having inherited my Italian grandmothers ridiculous 6th sense.....I decided to call said appointment host only to be told that he decided to take a few more days off and would not be returning to his PAID position until next Wednesday.

Since when can you just drop important-scheduled appointments and not bother to contact anyone? Don't bother calling me, I will just rearrange my whole day for this asshole so that he can sit on his fat ass at home a little while longer. This all runs in the same category with me about those who are late, those who completely suck at their jobs that we have to tolerate and my other biggest one--not getting what you pay for.

I ordered an online gift certificate for Numnuts at Boatersworld.com. Do you know these jerkoffs took my large amount of money (immediately) then claimed 3 times to have sent me what I ordered and then accused me of not being able to properly use my email. Now I am no genius, but one thing I do know is how to use this damn computer AND MY EMAIL! It was some little Asian guy who didn't even speak English telling me that it was my fault. I went berserk....

Needless to say, I called back the office where I had a scheduled meeting this morning and tore a new asshole in his supervisor making sure to state that I had lost valuable time and money because of his employees ignorance and negligence.....then I demanded my money back within 24 hours from Boatersworld.com and told them to find at least one person who might speak fucking English to deal with the public. I refuse to take this shit as a consumer and member of what is supposed to be a competent society. Do some research...this type of shit does not happen in other nations. This is a sloppy, American trait.

Everyone needs to watch the movie Sicko by Michael Moore. It clearly reiterates how screwed up our society really is. Americans are fat, lazy, selfish, ignorant and our government is intolerable. Many in our society do not deserve the freedom that we all take for granted. Watch the movie and you will see what I am talking about. We let our people starve and die of illnesses that can be prevented...how is this possible? I for one am 100% for socialized medicine.

Hillary Clinton tried for it years ago (and then got bought out)--maybe this round she can make it happen. Unless of course all of the fat, lazy, insured people would prefer a few more children go without care and let's not forget all of the hero's from 9/11 and our wounded soldiers who now wait for their demise because they have no health care. I could rant for hours on this one, but just watch the movie.....

So, how's everyone else doing today?

Fa la la la la............

(This is an actual picture of a Walmart store on Black Friday--scary, isn't it?)


My, my, my.....where have the days gone. It has been almost a week since I bitched about the Steelers. Now I get to decide if I want to give up on them this week or not---again!

So, what have all of my fine "IF" contributors been up too? Let me guess--scrambling around to get Christmas in order so that all of your hard work and efforts can be squashed within a matter of hours? Moving money around from here to there so it doesn't look like you have spent as much as you have? Making the plans on how in the world you see everyone in the short hours provided in the Christmas timeline? Scrambling to get the cards out even though we know everyone just opens them and says, "Oh that was nice."

If this is you--then we have something in common. I would love to revert back to the childhood excitement once in awhile. Do you remember lying in bed Christmas eve just praying that sleep will find you so that you can run downstairs in the morning to confirm that you have been a good girl/boy? That was the best!!!!

Do you remember where you were when you found out that Santa was really mom and dad who were dealing with all of this anxiety? I do. My brother ruined it for me. He dragged me out of my toasty warm bed and we crept down the stairs, peeked around the corner and saw the pseudo "Santa & Mrs. Claus" putting all the gifts that my father broke his back to provide--perfectly around the tree. I should have known at that point my brother would turn out so troublesome!

Anyway, in the midst of all of our madness to ensure a bright and cheerful holiday for those we love--I suggest we stop for a minute, close our eyes and get back that feeling of excitement, if just for a moment. I did it yesterday (while Darren and I were fighting over where to park at the mall) and it made for a better event!

We must keep in mind that millions around the world would kill for the luxuries of life that we so easily take for granted. As American consumers it seems our biggest concern during this time is deciding what digital picture frame has the best resolution and will Best Buy really get more Nintendo Wii's before xmas? The shame of it all..........

Stop, breath, and thank God.

Feminine Instinct.............

Thanks to the Pittsburgh Steelers inability to cover the spread that should have given them hope---my Christmas is canceled. See what happens when I have too much time on my hands! I really need to get out more and gambling should be illegal!

Just kidding--it is a lot of fun as long as you don't lose more than you have. I know many of you are big Steeler supporters, but I think I should have gone with my old ways of betting...

PICK THE BEST LOOKING QUARTERBACK! When I was a teenie-booper I would spend every Sunday at my Nonnies house watching and picking every game on the tube and eating the best damn sauce in the country! My uncle and I used to put our money where our mouth was and attack the NFL lineup: 2/3 team parlays, teasers, straight wagers, and my old favorite, "I'll take the points--love to support the underdog."

My strategy used to be designed around the color of their uniforms and the attractiveness of the quarterbacks. I used to win all the time. I loved the Dolphins (Danny Marino and that uniform made my car payment many a times). Now that I am older, I still enjoy the occasional dabble in the Sunday excitement, but I think I need to go back to my old ways.

So, Tom Brady (who is mighty fine) and the color blue (which I love) would have made me a big winner yesterday. This has also worked well with Brady Quinn (Notre Dame) in the past. Another fine example of why I need to follow my feminine instinct.

For the record---I know I am supposed to be a big "Steeler Supporter" but damn they play like a bunch of school girls sometimes. I don't care how good New England is supposed to be.....that was embarrassing.

Hardening of the Heart...

A very dear and respected male friend of mine has suggested a topic that I believe is affecting him--so it is our duty to see if we can give some positive insight. Since most of us can relate to this issue, I am sure all perspectives will be appreciated. So here it goes:


Why is it so difficult for us to open up and accept a potential new relationship after our hearts have been destroyed?


I will address this from my personal experience. I had a 5 years stint with someone for whom I would truly consider the love of my life. He was not all what I had dreamed of, but he was the only person that I feel I loved enough to have considered marriage and children with. Sadly, he was no where near mature enough or committed enough to make me pursue that direction, but I loved him immensely--still do.

After the end of the relationship which was trying throughout....I immediately put up my defenses and decided that no one would ever make me feel that way again. The feelings I speak of are unconditional love, fear, joy, resentment, excitement, jealousy, anger, betrayal, and unbridled sexual passion.

I was not young per say when this relationship ended...I was 31. When it finally did, I felt a tremendous loss and a lot of feelings of mistrust. I figured if these feeling could result with him, they may occur again and I would not let that happen. So for about 2 years I stayed as far away from any man that could potentially sway me to love again. I really didn't think I could ever fully regain those emotions---even though the one I had originally loved was so wrong for me. I didn't know that then...hell I just figured that out recently.

I did eventually establish a new relationship (the one I have now), but I do think the loss that I felt from my past love has rolled over to make me more aware of his faults and not as accepting. So, is Numnuts being punished because of my previous love. Maybe a little. It is not intentional, nor do I compare the two, but the amount of grief I felt when we parted was so much that I will never let anyone make me love them that much.

So..my advice to you my dear friend: Give it time, do not ask for more than you are willing to give, talk with her openly about your willingness to be patient, and make an effort to show your unique qualities. When a woman has fallen hard..it is something she will never forget. No matter how wonderful life becomes, if we gave our heart once--we can give it again, but it may have shrunk a little or now wears a protective coat, but it can and will be used once the fear has subsided.

If she is truly worth it to you...the time you have with her will be valuable. It may not be or ever be the full amount you want, but do not take it personally. New age women have decided that we can survive without being led by a man and many whose hearts have hardened have found it easier to just do without. I do not think that is the best recourse, but for some it may take years of self discovery and the eventual lonliness to kick in--but the odds are she will come around if you are worth it. And my friend you are worth it so just be patient.


Please share some of your experiences.....

Dear Sunday:

Thank you for your interest but, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. In other words, I don't have time nor do I care what you want from me. And I am too wrapped up in my own selfish age old needs to give a insanely driven, committed and potentially valuable team player like you an opportunity. I would rather sit here in my big cushy corner office and click and delete every email that comes from great women like you--who might actually think of me as a mentor. My how I love this country. As long as I stay white and old...I am good to go!

Oh how I love the world of technology. Our fabulous information highway has made it possible for people to crush one another without even muttering an actual word. The past few days I have received three different rejection emails. Two were from big PR companies I was attempting to work for and the final was from an online magazine I pulled my hair out to produce a ridiculous "How To" article that in my opinion was better than anything I have seen on their site. And no I am not being biased...it was too well written.

Ironically, I am surprised that I received any correspondence whatsoever. My point with this is how easy it has become for anyone to just squash another in a matter of seconds. Think about it---you can send an email that is of grave importance to you and within a matter of seconds the recipient can come back with a complete and utter shut down of your dreams or aspirations. Crazy.......

I think companies should be required to meet with every individual that has enough interest to even want to work for them. I am not saying that every Tom, Dick, and Rita that thinks they have a shot should be cordially invited to sit with the CEO, but if someone is qualified, educated, and aggressive enough to pursue you--then they should be able to pitch their intent face to face.

If I was a big gun at one of these firms--I would be curious about potential team players. My thoughts would be, "I wonder if this pain in the ass little shit can be molded and guided to make me more money." Simply rejecting people via email is a loss to our workforce and just another victory for "Old Whitey" as I call him who has sat at the helm far too long.

Am I pissed off that I keep getting rejected---sure am. Will it stop me from continuously pursuing what I know I deserve--no fucking way. What I will do once positioned where I feel I should be is make a valiant effort to let those who took 13 seconds of their lives to tell me no---why they should have taken 15 minutes to tell me yes. I am tired of the old white men ruling the universe....I really mean that.

I Forget Sometimes.....But Only For a Moment.

For all my southern friends...see what you are missing? I do love winter in the city!

Well, sorry for the piss poor mood yesterday, but hey we are all entitled to have one now and then. It is those who continuously have them that should consider medication. I am feeling pretty good this morning....I really do blame hormones for my mood swings. I wrote about it early on when I started this thing. It is the only aspect of being a woman that is dislike.

It is a beautiful morning here in the burg and the "snow is a fallen!" It really is a beautiful sight--unless you head out before the lazy ass salt crews. I can't help but think of all of the people who are effected when this type of weather sets in. I am snuggly warm, sitting at my pretty table next to my beautiful Xmas tree...snug as a bug.

But do you know how many families are sitting right now cold and unable to crank their furnaces to a sweet 72 degrees? A whole hell of a lot. It is times like this that I feel shameful that I have the nerve to complain. I suppose we all forget that once in a while. I am making it my mission to stop and reflect when I do my spoiled baby, oh poor me act. Like I said--it is the hormones. Maybe today we can each stop what we are doing and look at our surroundings and thank the man upstairs and those who share in our vast fortunes. I did.

So, when is the last time all of you fine dressed "IF" Crusaders went through your closets? With this cold weather creeping in.....I bet there are hundreds of great folks out there that would appreciate that sweater Aunt Barb got you 2 years ago. I am going to spent the early part of the afternoon putting together some bags of my privilege together in hopes of warming up a few people. Anyone care to join me? Today may be a good day to give back.

OH AND HEY JIMMY......YOU ARE GOING TO PASS. KEEP SAYING IT, OVER AND OVER. YOU ARE GOING TO PASS, YOU ARE GOING TO PASS--GET EXCITED! IT WILL WORK.

Beyond Disappointment.........

I am in a pissed off mood with nothing nice to say so I will heed the advice of my dead grandmother and keep my mouth shut. Anybody have anything funny or nice to say--please chime in and I will gladly respond. Yesterday sucked and for some reason it has rolled over to today and if I could blink my eyes and wake up anywhere else--I would.

How are you doing?

Jigsaw Puzzle

It seems that Life could be compared to a giant jigsaw puzzle
With each person like each piece
Having a place where they fit perfectly
Yet so many in there need to belong
Grab the first place they come to
Then try to make it fit
And because of this
They are never quite in harmony
With their adjoining pieces
Thus they never get to know
The way it was truly meant to be

Author unknown

My Holding Pattern....

It is Sunday morning and I woke at 5:23 A.M. Talk about someone with severely unused energy. The thing is when I rise my mind is racing and I sometimes overwhelm myself with enthusiasm only to be left.....waiting. I am writing this morning for me and I have a whole lot to say---so here goes.

I have been in a holding pattern for the past 3.5 years that is more snarled than any they have ever seen at NY's LaGaurdia. I have been on hold to unleash my talents, finally achieve the damn recognition I deserve and surpass any income that I have ever made. That my friends is a very tall order.

Let me explain---having moved back to the the place I swore at the age of 21 I would never see again was a very strategic and humble plan that has put me on this hold position that I speak of.

My life was wildly guided my me and me only. Instead of going into the boring (unless it's about you) history of my past...I will sum it up with this. I have never not had some sort of job or income since I was 15 years old. I also never once had to ask family, friends, or strangers for rent money or food. After the loss of my business (my own decision to crash by the way) I had a small stint with friends helping while I tried to figure out what the fuck happened and what the fuck now. It was much appreciated but caused more harm than any damn good. But I am grateful....in case you are reading.

The Pittsburgh move was not to be closer to my family...there I said it. The Pittsburgh move was a last resort, but a planned resort. I had always kept my drivers license in PA. I lived in California, Florida, NC with a PA residence...I never knew why I hadn't changed it and never really had thought anything about it. I figured out why in 2002. Must have been something subliminal.

When I left PA..I was enrolled in college, had a job with some high rolling lawyers making about $40,000 (under the table) and spent every day at 5 P.M. with a bunch of professionals drinking. Sounds pretty good for a 21 year old. It wasn't--I needed to be free to explore my potential---fuck structure and routine. So I dropped everything, and moved. Just like that no plan (didn't need one I knew how to work), left school, and picked a pretty little sunny, yet to explode state--NC. Knew no one there....I liked it that way.

I could go on and on about the next 12 years and a few states later. But I won't...we all have our history like I said. The point here is the drivers license. When I finally fell flat on my face after 12 years...no help....good money.....no money. That crazy notion that has always embedded in the back of my mind--What if? I came back to PA to get the education I proclaimed to have for the past 12 years. What did I just say? I claimed to have the education that everyone assumed I had.

Now why would everyone think that? I will tell you why. Because I am so fucking smart that school was and still is a complete and utter joke to me. Unless you put me in a quantitative (that means numbers folks) engineering situation that will smother the fuck out of the left side of the brain---I can learn it, do it, and explain it to someone else without any sweat. Truth is...it doesn't mean I am a genius or that I have fully mastered the craft at hand, but I can grasp it hard enough and long enough to ensure that others will believe I can and I will die trying to prove it.

That is a fucking art and one that I have yet to unleash. So back to PA. and why? Where else could I go to school as a resident (hence the drivers license) and pay $40,000 instead of $80,000. I am a resident--remember, always have been for some reason. The reason showed itself when the shit hit the fan. My family is here....maybe for once they could help, can go right back to where I left off at my old school, throw away all of the free to roam attitudes and lock myself up for a few years and get that God damn piece of people that stopped me dead in my tracks when I could no longer enjoy the lack of structure.

Hey Sunday, it does not matter how skilled you are--it does not matter how fucking smart you are or how much you love waking up at 5 A.M. or that you have never needed anyone's financial assistance in your life---or that you could help an enterprising firm make millions--today. You need your degree. Other than those wildly exciting entrepreneurs no one will accept you these days without that expensive (should have had 12 years ago)--I could have taught most of those classes myself---piece of---I am in a holding pattern fucking paper.

Whew that felt good. Yesterday I had the uncanny opportunity of meeting someone who could potentially make me a King. Yes, I said King, not Queen. I don't want to be a Queen they are second in command---I must be King. Ironically, I had just sent one of my (as you can imagine) explosive letters to his firm stating my excellence and intention. I had no idea I would be attending a luncheon where he would be speaking-coincidence? Truth be told I just need his firm to place me while I give another 20K for more education so I can really prove I am smart.....that is what the paper says. I think the paper says I have held back all of my potential for another 3 years and it makes me want to explode.

Now I have to play the entry level, willing to work 70 hours a week to show you I can do it, while I get another degree (cause I can), so that the real company I see myself ruling will even sneeze my way. I am reaching for big, big, power. Do any of you think like that? Or do you think settling for a JOB of 40-50K is acceptable? This man yesterday said something that made me want to work for him even more. He said, "People ask him all the time, Can I make money in PR?" He answered, "You can make money when you finally get the chance to do what you love--regardless." The bad part is...sometimes you have to wait to prove to everyone that what you love you can do better than most.

I am not sure what this rant is about--oh yes, my holding pattern. Do you know how frustrating it is for someone so personality type A--to wait for an opportunity? It is like someone is sitting on me while holding a pillow over my head and just giving me enough breath to make it for 3.5 years. Or putting a wild animal in a cage and telling it--just hang on big girl we'll have you out of here in a few years.

Have you ever made a list of great titles you know you could master with the right amount of immediate (a good mentor) guidance with continued and acquired experience. I have and it is wild. I am going to list them.....I really believe I can do all this shit.

I could be one of the best.....

Sports Agents
Professor (I strive for the likes of NYU, Columbia, some place like that)
Magazine Article Writer
Publicist (Big name stars or political figures---this is my dream job!)
Mother (my child would be so well rounded and motivated it would be sick)
Sports Commentator (sidelines) I wanted to do that before it was acceptable--imagine that.
Crisis Negotiator
Advertising Executive (I mean big commercials, not little brochures or piss ass news releases)
Senator (I am arrogant enough and actually care about public policy)
Political/Entertainment Spokesperson--I can spin it like nobodies business
Executive Assistant to a major CEO--I am talking Donald Trump, August Busch III, or Martha.

Guess what? Not only do I need a degree to get anywhere near these exhilarating careers--I better fucking know somebody. There is no way in hell to get any big wig job unless you can get someone to walk your ass in the door. And you better be willing and able to do everything and anything you are asked to do. If I could get a private list of where the people whose careers I want to master have happy hour---I could get the job. That is how the world is run and that is how it will remain.

OK, I am done now. Just needed to get that off my chest. I really don't expect any comments sometimes I just write to hear myself think.

sb

Friday Night Rendezvous.........

I just want everyone to know what my big Friday night entails. I will be having a "couples night" with my man and his mother and step father. She has started these Friday night gatherings where we eat together and then snuggle up on her new enormous sectional and watch movies. Call the po-lice there's gonna be wild bunch in the burgh tonight!

For those of you who knew me when.........."My how life has changed." Don't get me wrong, I am grateful that I have a potential mother-in-law for whom I can "hang with", but geeze oh man what a fucking snore monster I am becoming. It is times like this that I really miss the good ole days.

This goes to show how many personalities we possess. This morning I was thinking about Vegas. Going there in the past, dancing all night, making strange new friends and man how I would enjoy a trip like that right now. This evening I will be chit-chatting about holiday cookies and saying, "Oh I just love the ones with the kisses."

I have to wonder if there is a way to combine the two? I know one way, but unfortunately the one person who can help me with this is has yet to produce. For the record mom just called and asked me to pick up devil dogs and ice cream.......oh someone kill me.

What is even more baffling is when did my guy suddenly start enjoying these things? I hope I am not to blame for that. I better ask him....

Repeat After Me......

I would like to someday understand why men are unable to say what they really feel? Is it a genetic malfunction? Is it that they are not capable? Or is it simply they have learned that they can get away with saying as few words as possible?

I think it it safe to say that women constantly express their emotions (even the tough ones) only to find that the person for whom they are expressing them self to (if male) often neglects to respond. I am being very vague about this so here is a fine example.

Gentlemen: If a woman says how she feels about you or a certain subject open your mouth and say something back! It does not have to be the right response--just a response. Nothing is more frustrating to a woman than feeling as if she is talking to a mute. If you are privileged enough to have her tell you she misses you, she wants you, she can't wait to screw you....whatever, use that moment to your advantage.

Ladies tell me if I am right about this: If your man takes 3 seconds and responds to something you have presented to him, does it or does it not have the ability to influence your entire day? Yes, I know...amazing that a few little words could have such a great impact. Honestly, I think it is pathetic, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.

So let's all practice---ready? WOMAN: Hi Mike. How are you? Hey I just want you to know that I really miss seeing you. MIKE: I miss seeing you too. Oh my god!!! See how easy that was? Guaranteed the person for whom Mike just said he missed will have some added pep in her step and be happily thinking of great ways to reward him. It is really that pathetic.

Women are driven by words. Good words, bad words, just give her some feedback. If Mike didn't miss her it is OK for him to tell her that too. She would rather know then assume that he might. Finally the one word answers...OK, NO, YES, SURE---I fucking hate them. I need at least a fragment....so please just spit it out. It could really make someones day.

I am not suggesting that all men are guilty as charged (Don, Jimmy) but the majority I have encountered in my life do this on a daily basis and it is something we women discuss endlessly.

So ladies......is a 3 second response enough to make your day?

Dare to Dream...Then Make it a Reality!

When I was a little girl I told everyone that I was going to be the first female NFL referee. Yep, that was my one big wild goal in life. I liked their uniforms and I liked that they got to play with all the boys.

To my knowledge that industry is yet to have a female "ref" so maybe I can still fulfill that fantasy.......I would love being able to pat those boys on the ass every Sunday and say, "Good job big guy!"

Do you ever think back to what you dreamed of when you were a child? Do you remember how fun it was to dream of doing those things? Are you doing any of them now? If you had one dream that you could make a reality tomorrow--what would it be and do you think it is remotely possible to fulfill?

My adult dream: Be a critically acclaimed writer who spends half of my year in Europe promoting my work and the other half back home in 2 bedroom loft on the Upper West Side in NY.

Do I think it is possible.....sure do.

The way I look at it--I have at least 30 more years to produce my dreams. I figure the first part of my life was for me to figure out who I am and what I can do. The second is to implement what I have discovered and apply it. If I had my dream too early in life I would have probably blown it and most likely wouldn't have appreciated the effort it took to get there.

I can't stand it when people say, "Oh, I am too old to start that now." I feel that only applies when you are too dead to start that now.

Dreams? Ever thought about making them a reality? Don't get me wrong if the NFL came to me and said, "Hey Citizen Sun, how about putting on these tight white pants and chasing some big men with great big beautiful asses around the field every Sunday." I would be all over it! Odds are I have a better chance at the writer gig, but you never know.....

God Has an Amazing New Angel.......

This morning I received the very sad word from my lifelong friend Hillary that her grandma that we call "Oma" passed away on Saturday, November 24, 2007.

I remember this special woman as being one of the strongest and influential women I have ever met in my life. She was powerful and beautifully soft all at the same time.

Oma was everything I strive to be on a daily basis. She demonstrated feminine strength long before most women realized they could. My deepest and most sincere love and condolences goes out to Hillary and her entire family.

Jansje (Oma's given Dutch name) means "A Gift From God." She certainly was and now our God has her back--Thank you Lord for letting us share her with you. She will be missed in our hearts everyday, but never forgotten.

Thank you Oma for being an influence in my life.

How Do You Function?

Dear Alcoholics:

How in the world do you survive? What a tremendous toll you are taking on your body. I had a total of 4 drinks (in 6 hours) yesterday/last night and I feel as if every organ in my body has been violently diseased. You must stop what you are doing at once! If I feel this horrible for having a few drinks every couple of months I feel it is my duty to tell all of you who do this on a regular basis to stop killing yourself! Booze should be illegal!

To me there is nothing worse then spending money to wake up in the morning and feel like pure hell. I consider myself to be pretty healthy and if a small amount of alcohol causes this much pain in a healthy body---I can only imagine what it is doing to your regularly polluted body. Poison my friends, poison. Your liver called me last night and asked me to write this so for those of you who think "No harm in a little drink" RETHINK. Nasty, nasty stuff.

Where is the Excitement?

In the past two days I have done everything that I had anticipated doing over this brief holiday and now I am suddenly left bored and unfulfilled.

On Thursday, I raced around to everyone's house to make sure I could pitch in and help all of the cooks/hosts only to receive a little less than a nod of thanks. The crowds at both houses sat around all hum-drum and beside my normal anxiety--they all bored me to death.

Then yesterday I got up early...pulled out the remainder of the Xmas decorations anticipating hours of long work and childhood excitement only to get it all done and look around and say, "Well that really fucking sucked." Now what?

Finally my beloved 12-year-old niece stayed the past two nigths so that she could work me for her $80.00 boots (she just had to have) only to discover that once they were bought the fun was also abruptly over.

Where is the excitement? Am I the only one that anticipates things are going to be fulfilling only to find that they are NOT! I wonder...do people have spicy, entertaining lives? If so...could someone please give them my number. I feel so vibrant and young all of the time, but my days are becoming motherly. I told my Numnuts that my lifestyle is perfect for a little Numnuts--although I would rather have my eyelids pulled over my head.

Those of us without husband and child (and I know who you are)---why are we living the lifestyle of the "married and motherly" and not taking advantage of the "free and frisky" lifestyle that we actually have? I woke up this morning and realized that all of the "nice" shit I did the past 2 days actually sucked and I am tired of convincing myself that all of this goodie-goodie stuff is going to make me happy. I am very good at it...but I think it straight up blows.

What if I got hit my a bus tomorrow. The final things I did were make some stupid cookies, dust off 100 stuffed snowmen, buy a 12-year-old (who would rather be on her myspace) some expensive boots and wash a thousand dishes for my mother. Oh shoot me now!

My alter ego is on high alert. No more Mary Poppins bullshit for me---I hate Mary Poppins she is creepy. I am looking for those of you who want some excitement in your life. Let me know if you do.

Gobble, Gobble, Gobble.......

THE "ONLY" THANKSGIVING SONG---ADAM SANDLER ON SNL

http://www.truveo.com/Thanksgiving-Song/id/153837564

This is a true classic and well worth a look! I hope everyone has a tasty and memorable Thanksgiving Day! I just heard that the average person eats 5000 calories on this day. Isn't that wild? I say eat, eat more, and eat again. Oh and don't forget to thank the cooks more than once.

Everyone needs to get up and carry some dishes and the main cook should sit down. I like football too and probably have a few bucks riding on the game so we should all jump in and get it done!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE! I am truly grateful for each and every one of you.

Have You Ever Noticed?

Why after 36 years am I so baffled by the likes of Peppermint Patty? Have you ever really taken a good look at this character that Charles Shultz created in 1966?

I was watching Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving special lastnight and I took a long hard look at this mixed up individual. Peppermint Patty is a girl, looks like a boy, acts like a boy, has a crush on Charlie Brown and Marcie calls her "Sir".

I think it is rather strange that such a character was brought to light in the 1960's. I know....strange topic, but I never really took much interest in her until lastnight. I guess as children we do not dig deep into the layers of a person--we simply like or dislike them.

I have to wonder what Charles Shultz was thinking when he made her a member of the Peanuts clan. Ironically, one would think that Peppermint Patty would have been a terrible outcast in those days. She would seem to fit in much better in the 21st century. Nowadays it's almost fashionable to be sexually confused.

I know you are all probably saying, "Citizen Sun has lost her marbles." I just really never noticed how odd this character was......I guess as a little girl I was just happy to see those funny little faces prancing around on the family television. Oh to be a child again......less thought, less judgement and social acceptance. Maybe we should all revert back to our childhood once in awhile and stop looking at the indifferences in people and just be glad to be prancing around.

Slightly Premature..but What the Hell!

If you know me--then you know I LOVE THE HOLIDAYS! If Numnuts would let me, our pretty house would already be glimmering bright with my holiday lights. But I will refrain...until Friday. My one and only niece and I will be wrestling the old ladies that morning then we will come home and decorate for Christmas...I can't wait!

So with Thanksgiving upon us and the mad rush to please everyone just around the corner--I am asking each of you to take a moment and list 5 things you are truly grateful for. Be honest, creative and remember the tone of this forum..anything goes. Don't be shy and the we all know the healthy, good family, ones.......

Here is my list:

1. I am grateful that I have a nice ass.

2. I am grateful that I am not only attractive, but really smart too!

3. I am grateful that I still enjoy sex and my sexuality.

4. I am grateful for my ability to see the good and bad in people and not judge them.

5. I am grateful for my wonderful life---so that I can spend my mornings doing this!

6. One extra for good measure....I am very grateful for my Numnuts. I forget sometimes, but today I made it my mission to let him know.

OK--there you go.

And you?

Baby Boom or Baby Bust?

Since we all know my take on children--let's talk about the other blood lined relations we are responsible for.....our AGING PARENTS.

I for one feel it is my absolute duty to care for the well-being of my parents. Sadly, too many "adult children" remain in the position as "child" and continue to take from their parents even though they should be quite capable to fend for themselves, but don't.

My parents are both 60 years old. By no means considered elderly, but statistics show that most life altering illnesses develop during this period of your life and if you beat it---you have a greater chance of survival through the 80's.

So what does this mean to me? It means that I should and can do as much as possible to make their life a little easier. It is my obligation and I do it without any reservations. I know people who still take money from their parents, make them babysitters, basically let their beloved parents fend for themselves with household maintenance and physical obligations.

I say to these overgrown thumb suckers.....shame on you! The years that our parents are discovering are supposed to be joyous and hassle free. We should not drown them with our sorrows and we should make as many sacrifices as necessary to ensure their comfort and security. On a personal note....my only brother is one of these children. He selfishly bombards my parents with his woes in life and I constantly provide all that I can for their comfort.

We need to remember that our parents are responsible for our initial existence and up until we reach maturity, but not for the duration of our lives. The tables should turn and we should want to make life as easy as possible. My parents pretend as if they don't want my help...but they do and they generally appreciate it.

My question to all of you is: Do you or will you provide for your parents when necessary? Do you feel it is your obligation or a priviledge?

Say it, Mean in and Say it Again!

One thing I am constantly accused of is overly speaking my mind. Is it always appropriate? No way. Am I always right--hell no. Will I stop openly expressing my opinion even when I know it may cause some controversy--NEVER! If I have an issue with my Numnuts--trust me, he knows it and he will hear about it until it is resolved. I have a very good reason for handling things this way........

It is important as women to speak our minds at will. Daily I encounter strong, big-hearted women who have something weighing on their minds, but instead of releasing it and moving forward--they repress it. This can be a very dangerous scenario.

A recent study came out that suggested that women have a higher risk of heart attack and stroke because of our innate ability to just hold back aggressions. We produce a chemical called oxytocin that supposedly helps calm us during times of intense stress (work, children, relationships, crisis, etc.). Sounds great, but here are some facts:

*Women who bury their emotions (to keep the peace) are 73% more likely to suffer from heart disease later on in life.

*Over 60% of women believe their biggest health threat is breast cancer but heart disease kills 6 times as many women as breast cancer.

*Heart attacks often strike without warning. If a woman does not realize heart disease is a health threat, she will not make heart healthy changes or respond to symptoms once they occur.

*Women are less likely to survive heart attacks then men. Doctor's still don't know why. Stress is a major factor in causing heart disease in women.

My point with all of this is---if you have something on your mind please say it, mean it, say it again and get it off your chest. If you don't it may just kill you.

So friends for the sake of your health and to keep that pretty little heart "a tickin" please express yourself today. Let it out, get to the point and then let it go...........

CS

I Don't Like or Want Children...So What!

My least favorite question-----"When are you going to make me a grandmother?" I absolutely, 100%, HATE that question. The beautiful part is that my fabulous mother is NOT the one asking. This dreaded topic has been haunting me since my very first Numnuts.

I have learned to somewhat take it as a compliment--every would be mother-in-law I have ever had has asked me to make them a grandmother. Guess that says something about me. I tend to give a smart ass answer nowadays. Something like, "When doctor's figure out how to make them come out of his pee pee." Or, when I decide if I really like you." That one always seems to change the subject. I adore my "someday" mother-in-law, but since I openly tell her that I don't really like children (bring on the criticism) then one would think she would stop asking!

Designer purse snatchers (as I call them) are not for everyone. I love my niece and nephew, but I also love sending them home. There are thousands of "IF" women out there just like me that say, "I just don't like them." As much as I love the holidays.....sadly the topic will come up and usually at the dinner table surrounded by his entire family...

It is time for people to accept the fact that it is OK for a woman to admit that she does not carry the motherly gene. If she is over 35 and doesn't have a DPS there is probably a very good reason.

For the record: My niece and nephew think I am the coolest thing since XBox and for those of you who are fab moms/dads...I do love your children and admire your courage. But don't ask me to babysit or come to the kiddie birthday parties. I will gladly send a great monetary gift that has a purpose.

So my "IF" crusaders......care to admit your likes/dislikes for the little ones?

Why it's Good to be Bad......

If you are like me--you tend to spend your days living by the many creeds of the universe. "Don't do this, don't say that, thou shall not, you'll go to jail if you".......

Who in the hell made up all of these rules and why do I have to follow them? This is what I want to know. And what about those of you who say, "Screw the rules, I am going to live my life for me?" I say--Amen to you rebels because it really does not pay to be good.

Last night Numnuts (who for the record has been fantastic while my girl was in town) said to her..."Stick around, Citizen Sun will make sure you stay on the straight and narrow." It actually made my stomach turn. Since when am I so good that I could guide another on a better path?

I never wanted to be that person. I want to be a hellion. Why? Because if people become accustomed to you ALWAYS doing the right thing then look out when they think you have done something wrong. You might as well paint a Scarlett letter on your chest and parade around town because all of a sudden you are devil girl.

I know a few people who I used to shake my head at and think---How do they live with them self? Now, I have a new attitude. I say, forget that straight and narrow line that is supposed to lead you through the pearly gates. Hey according to my religion big man upstairs ALWAYS forgives so why should I care what the commoners think?

Finally, I am starting to believe that if you are generally bad...think of how much praise you will get if you do something good! Might be worth a try.

So are you tired of being good?

Lucky Little Me.......

Pittsburgh Steeler's newest fan...Sonnie

I am feeling very grateful today. I can't say there is one particular reason, but I will mention that overall I am one blessed mo-fo! Great friends, loving family, and yes, Numnuts. I try and pick at least one day a week to wake in the morning and identify what is note worthy. Stop for a minute today and reflect on how fortunate you are......you might be pleasantly surprised!

Off to the Steeler game with NC's finest.......Sonnie. I hope those 80,000 people at Heinz Field know what their in for! Have a great day everyone and NM---you are a gem.

Citizen Grateful

What is Yours is Yours...Hey What About Me?

What is the proper protocol when one partner makes more money than the other? Is it supposed to be 50/50....or every man for them self?

According to Money Magazine women are rapidly becoming the breadwinners in the family. I say hooray, but the studies also show that these women are having to battle each day somewhat denying their success. What gives?

"Women who earn more tend to behave very differently from men who are the breadwinners according to relationships claims money expert Professor Jan Pahl."

I am not one of these women--YET. Numnuts makes substantially more than I do. I used to be OK with that---now it is my mission to surpass him. But when I do---he will want for nothing. Maybe.

Are we as couples supposed to share our earnings equally? Am I wrong for thinking that our lifestyles should be comparable?

I primarily fend for myself-he takes care of the household expenses, but hell--it's his house! I take care of all of my expenses and everything (food, supplies, etc.) that comes into this house and do everything humanly possible to make his life easier. Cook, clean, laundry, his lunches...you get the drift. He even gets his jammies set out for him at night (pathetic, I know).

Our finances are completely separate. I have a problem with that. Do I want access to his checkbook? No way....but when he wants anything and I mean anything...he gets it. This is not the case for me. I am very conservative on spending, not because I want to---I have to.

Is it fair for the breadwinner to eat all of the bread and only give the supposed love of their life a little nibble of the crust? Am I wrong for thinking that he should want to share his success with me? Keep in mind......odds are within the next 2 years...I will be earning more than him. This has been the master plan, which had always included me sharing every ounce of it with him.

What gives?

*For the record...he has done a lot for me, but he has gotten every bit of it back by the quality of care he receives.

Does She/He Have a Name?

One of my fabulous "IF" contributors just recommend a very flavorful topic..so here goes:

WHAT DO YOU CALL YOUR PRIVATE PART?

My Puta

I just call him tiny! When I was younger, it was Mr. Oneeye.---Jimmy

I call mine lonley---Anonymous

Choochi.....you know who I am!

Kitty---Anonymous

Goochi...anonymous



And the rest of you?

Call David Cooperfield..We Need Some Magic!

Don wrote:

"Think about it...the only thing that separates a routine relationship with other family or friends from an intimate relationship is the SEX!"

I absolutely agree with that statement and the overall consensus seems to be that we all need to find ways of keeping the magic alive. So, what can we suggest to one another to keep our commitments while fulfilling our personal desires?

I ask that each one of you list a few things that you have tried or that you have considered trying and let's see what we come up with. Here are my suggestions:

1. Once a month meet in a hotel. Go to the bar and casually wait for your suitor. Be strangers, talk, introduce yourself, flirt and then take it to the room. Don't overly plan it...just time and date. Ladies...pull out that lingerie that has dust on it and consider wearing it under a trench coat.

2. If you cook dinner for your mate--how about dressing as a little school girl and be strategically bent over the stove ready to serve..when he arrives. (this ones for the girls--so put your bobbie socks away Jimmy!)

3. Forbidden places. Show up at their workplace, sneak of to the bathroom during a family dinner (Thanksgiving is just around the corner) or how about reverting back to the high school days and go parking!

OK...there are my top picks. And you?

Please take a moment.........

Today someone for whom I admire and truly love found out that she may be facing a very serious and difficult phase of her life, which concerns her health.

The results are still pending, but as she discussed the details with me all I heard was this amazing woman find humor with something that would make most people fall to the floor.

What I am asking from each and every one of you is this:

Whether you believe in God or not, I want you to take a moment and pray for her. That's all--just take a moment and pray that she will get through this unharmed and ready to keep those who love her most smiling.

For the sake of her privacy let's just call her Daisy. God will know who we are talking about.

Oh and Daisy......I got your back.

Thank you.

Sun

For the Record........

I wanted to take a moment and let everyone know why this forum is so important. We have some new contributors who may not know me--so I think it is crucial for them to understand that I have a true agenda and why their input is so valuable.

I have dreamed of being a writer my entire life. I took a thousand different paths that kept me from that dream, but am finally in a position to do what makes ME happy, but I want to use it to help others. Many people's lives are wrongly affected due to their relationships.

So where does the "IF" Crusade fit in? As each of you take those few minutes and join me in exploring these topics--I am developing articles for submissions in various publications. Am I looking to get rich from it--NO. Am I looking to discuss matters that in one way or another affect us all-YES. Some might say, "What does penis size have to do with anything?" Maybe our input will help some great guy understand what his woman needs because she has not been able to tell him. Maybe a woman has never achieved an orgasm in her entire life and can take some of the tips from all of you and finally enjoy her sexuality. Maybe she is newly single and hasn't given up on men and wants to get back out there.

Am I an expert in any of these topics? Depends on what you consider expert analysis. My sexual experience is extensive...I am 36 and have proudly lived. Would I be considered a sex/relationship expert? Academically--no, but life experience--yes. AND SO ARE ALL OF YOU! I get very disgusted when I read articles from people discussing relationships and sex or women's issues and it is solely their perspective.

All of the information you share with me with be utilized with one goal in mind. Everyone deserves a respected, loving, powerfully-sexual relationship and together we can guide each other to achieve such bliss.

I sincerely thank you for getting involved and I welcome all topics, genders, criticism, and perspectives. We may just turn all of this into a book and each of you will be fully credited and treated to the party of the century--on me!

If you would like to present special topics you may email them to Sunday315@aol.com or in the comment section and we will certainly address them.

**SPECIAL NOTE: Coming soon--I have an expert financial advisor who is going to be providing tips on investing for the "Frugal Female." The idea is for us to learn how to take what we make (regardless of income) and use it for financial gain and security. Yes it can be done! For the record ladies....he is very handsome. Stay tuned.

CS

Soul Sister Addendum....

My darling BCA:

You are the glimmering light at the end of a dark cubicle. You are such a positive, fierce female and anyone who meets you should call them self lucky. Your Tommy--while deserving, should thank God everyday that he has you to lean on...I know I do. Thanks for opening up and joining me on my crusade. You are a gift.

Jimmy--I have officially dubbed you one of my girls. Take it as a compliment. I hate girls. You have become a very trusted and needed part of my life. You are my friend without judgement you are my pillow talk pal. I value your belief in me and never stop telling me what a great ass I have! Thanks for being you.

Last, but surely not least....Little Miss Emily: She is someone who met me at my lowest point and reminded me of how to laugh, accept, and find my strength all over again. She is a winner on every level and if God ever wanted to pinpoint one person to show the world "How to be a mother" he would pick Emily. She is a blessed old soul in a vibrant young woman's body! Thank you Emily for always being there and for helping me keep my head up to shovel in the food!

Wife Swap--Threesomes. Not for Me-Some!

A few years ago several of my "coupled" friends started doing something I would have never imagined them doing. They would party all night and SWAP. You know what I am talking about...lose all of their inhibitions and engage in sexual activities with someone other than your partner and vice-versa.

As open minded as I claim to be--this is something that I have never been able to comprehend. I understand the erotica...but could I stand by and watch Numnuts bang some wildly-willing fresh meat? No fucking way.

Admittedly, I have used my half-tainted-creative-mind to visualize this act during a mid afternoon "solo" romp, but the idea of watching him tear into some new beaver is stomach churning.

Confident or not......sharing your Numnuts (in my opinion) is an admission of you feeling unable to satisfy your mate. As stagnant as relationship sex can become---there must be another way.

Threesomes---let's see. You are single, it is Tuesday, you are having some drinks with one of your fabulous "IF" friends and the 6'2 hot ass bartender is ready and willing.....what the hell.

For the record..the couples I am referencing above (wifeswap) are no longer coupled. Correlation?

Opinions/Experiences?

So What do you Want for Christmas?

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The Skinny on a Huge Topic........

OK kids--I need some input on this. I am writing an article on penis size. I need your vast knowledge. The focus is for men to understand that the size (in my opinion) does not really matter. OK, I would be completely out of my mind to say that 2" Charlie is gonna do the trick (although is has happened), but I also know it is a great myth to think that 12" Tommy is our best friend.

Here is what I would like to you address:

1. Does your emotional state control your sexual pleasure?

2. Is your point of orgasm determined upon insertion or full penetration?

3. Positions that increase/decrease pleasure regardless of size.

4. Girth or length?

5. Do all women hate doggie style or is that just me?

Since I know for certain that each of you has experienced BOTH ends of the spectrum...tell me how it worked out and what did you do to make the situation better.

That should do it for now. The article will be submitted to a men's mag as soon as I finish, so tell me-- Charlie or Tommy?

The Importance of my Soul Sisters....

I count my blessing daily for the women in my life. I, being one who has never been overly drawn to female companionship (always liked playing with the boys) have developed some amazing female soul sisters. The amazing part is........some of have been in my life for decades.

As a young girl I found myself completely uninterested in "girl things" such as Barbie, playing house, dress up, all that crap. I enjoyed baseball, dirt bikes, wrestling matches with the neighbor boys (ha ha) and pretty much anything that would put me with the boys. I have to wonder if there is a correlation between my comfort zone with them in the past and how I view them today.

Anyhow: Today's topic is dedicated to my beloved handful of female friends who have seen me at my absolute best and followed me through my absolute worst.

A few of my favorite episodes with each and why I love them:

Hilly G.--Shoe Shine Girls, Waking up in a strange place in Mexico, Hockey Players, Robert Plant episode, Myrtle Beach at Ohmas, bullying chicks in high school, my entire adolescent years, that forever bond.

Rhonda---The day you arrived at my store so that I could follow my dreams, the piercing, the many late nights feeling no pain and talking and dancing for hours, giving you my grandmothers ring, the strong support you always gave me--even when you new I was wrong, Hooter Days, that forever bond.

Sonnie---Terrible Tuesdays, plant delivery night, the day you walked in my store, your courage when the worst of the worst has happened, making cheese funny, how you always seem to be there in the morning, your sexuality, that forever bond.

Amy---My entire LA experience, the "G" level, when you do the little old lady, your courage to make big changes, when you forced me to fire you and then called me that night to party, busting in to all the cool clubs in LA, your ability to find me no matter where I am, that forever bond.

Denise---The newby of the bunch, Sunday morning's watching the people go to church, helping me find my damn horse, how I can tell you anything without an ounce of shame or embarrassment, your twisted incredibly bright mind, hunting down Tyler, your truck driver mouth, how you accept me for me, that forever bond.

I could go on and on about these amazing women. Ironically, with the exception of Denise...none of them are married, nor do they have children. I don't think there is one man good enough for any of them..........just my opinion of course.

My dear friends, I love you more than life itself. You have made me the person I am today and I feel it is important to let you know that no one could ever replace you.

Thank you for sharing my life with me.

sb

Be Proud of Your Sexual Past.........

If you are above the age of 25 and have yet to sign that legal document that proclaims your love for another---odds are you have a sexual past. Good for you! If you are above the age of 35 and have yet to sign the financial proclamation of your love-odds are, you have an extensive sexual past. Lucky You!

I have never been ashamed of my sexual past, in fact, I am proud of it. There may have been one or two that I should have passed on, but is that something to be ashamed of? Hell no.

The "IF" Crusade supports the idea of woman enjoying and exploring their sexuality. The notches on her bed post should be symbols of her self confidence--not scars of her past.

So, in my opinion here is a list of benefits to having explored my sexual urges:

1. I don't feel like I have missed out on anything that has to do with men.
2. I am comfortable with my body and accepting of physical faults--every body is beautiful.
3. I have something to add to the physical act--too many women lay like a crime scene chalk line.
4. I can openly discuss topics related to sex with my partner-which is the key to great sex.
5. Because of my sexual ability-I do not worry about my mate looking elsewhere.
6. I understand and have mastered the male anatomy. What do they really like, where not to touch, where to touch, how to make it last longer, working with smaller/bigger mechanical parts.
7. I understand and have sexually mastered the male libido. Why they don't always snuggle, what not to say during and afterwards, why it is easier for them, different forms of sex, etc.
8. I have no problem introducing myself to men or telling them exactly what I want because I know what it is.... (the challenge is getting them to listen).
9. I can do spectacular things with my body, mind, and soul that should be shared.
10. Positions, positions, and more positions.........

All of this information was passed on to me by my past lovers and I would like to thank them. So, tell me...what is wrong with a woman who has a phenomenal sexual past? Is she not to be trusted? Is she a dirty pirate whore? Or is she a huge advantage to some lucky bastard?

Why Hillary Clinton Won't Win............

OK, I have no idea if Hillary Clinton will be our next president or not, but what I do know is we (women) are quite often our biggest enemy. Let me explain.

Why are some women so cynical when it comes to another woman's success? Being that women have been fighting for their equality since the stone age--shouldn't we support each other when something great happens?

Yesterday I overheard some women discussing a past coworker who has moved on to bigger and better things. Instead of using that situation to aspire towards their own success, they spent about 30 minutes coming up with reasons why she didn't deserve the job. It was pathetic. I on the other hand thought, "Good for her and then the positive spin jumped in and I thought--hey if she can do it, so can I."

We are the cause of our own repression (not all of us, but many). Why wouldn't we support a woman when she betters herself and her situation? Is it jealousy? Why not stand behind her and open some doors for yourself? When the women congregate and decide that one of their own is not worthy of the job--doesn't this send a message to the white bread men who are still running the show? If you have ever worked in a company that is a nesting place for females...you know what I am talking about.

If I meet a woman who is successful and worked her way up...I immediately want to know her. I am not threatened by her...I want to learn from her. Number one rule of success: If you want to be successful you MUST surround yourself with successful people. If you spend your days standing around a bunch of complaining women/men who openly flaunt their weaknesses by cowardly disgracing others---then you deserve to be where you are and get comfortable because that is where you will remain.

If you know someone who has recently acquired a new job or promotion---go and give them a big old pat on the back because they deserve it and are probably a little rattled trying to deal with it all. You never know how that 3 seconds of support might just open a window for you to slither in.........WE MUST SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER LADIES!

Any thoughts?

Taking in Strays.........

You either invite them in or you close the door and worry about them until you are blue in the face. This is my experience with strays. So let's play a game--am I talking about the black cat who just happened to show up at my house the week of Halloween? Or am I talking about the people that come into my life? Here's the answer---BOTH. Some of us are magnets for the lost and needy. I am one of those magnets.

I can't say that I will always let the cat in, but if I meet a slightly wayward person, I feel it is my duty to listen to them. For example: A younger fella that works part time with numnuts came by yesterday. Within minutes I found myself prowling through his mind to find out which direction this young lad is heading with his future. As I expected, he was fumbling daily with what he wants to be when he grows up. So what do you think happened next?

I spent 2 hours discussing his potential and giving him a good old kick of confidence. He left with some serious "pep" in his step and within an hour sent me his resume and some very kinds words of how I made his day. Somehow, they find me. My point with all of this---I suppose it is not so bad to be the one that can motivate the troops, but when the battle gets too much to fight alone---will the soldiers be standing next to you ready to brawl? Let's hope so.

If you have someone in your life that takes any amount of time to support you in your constant quest to find yourself---make sure to pay it forward. If everyone could start their morning as this young lad did, think of all the great accomplishments there would be in a day.

I think we all need a morning motivator.....are you that person or have you recently taken your time to enhance the life of another? If so--how did it go?

I am Horribly Addicted....

Yesterday afternoon my beloved laptop crashed. I have not stopped trying to fix it since and I am completely and utterly lost and having severe withdrawals. Sweats, shaking, mood swings, the whole nine yards. As I sit in Numuts office uncomfortably using his link to the outerworld I realized something.....I am an addict.

Harsh words, harsh reality. I think I need some help. OK, joking, but MY GOD what did we do without these things? Did I really talk to people? Eeewww-who in the hell would want to do that all the time. Hence the problem with our society. Cowardly communication hidden behind a 17" monitor..with the exception of this fabulous blog!

Well, if I don't get my addiction up and running by tomorrow I am either going to seriously hurt someone or no one is getting any Xmas presents from me. Best Buy here I come! I enjoy my addiction and truely enjoy all of you who are my enablers.....please keep it coming and feel free to throw some of your favorite topics out there and I will post them. xoxo

Why I get Tired of Doing the Right Thing......

The older I get, I realize that you can be a complete piece of shit and people are going to be good to you. You can be an "ark angel" and people are going to stomp all over you. Not all the time, but it seems the worse you are anymore--the better you get treated. I don't understand it. My point--you can do absolutely nothing and be treated like a superstar. For people like me, who genuinely like helping others, but rarely get any recognition for it---this has become somewhat of a battle.

After my tremendous downfall in 2002, I realized that when the going gets tough...the help disappears. So I decided to do the same---disappear. I made a dramatic change, moved back up North and decided to focus on living as clean and proper as possible (without over doing it of course). Having been at that for almost 5 years, I have realized that it didn't make a damn bit of difference and you could be the next freaking Messiah and people would still run all over you.

If you are a natural born giver (like myself), imagine how much less stress you would have if you just stopped. No more listening every time the phone rings to someone complaining, no more loans or cash donations (since I never get the money back), forget about all the favors and putting your life on hold for others..........just stop doing all of it!!!!!

I would like to learn how to do that. I am not suggesting that we ALL become selfish little trolls, but maybe those who always put others first should just stop for awhile. Like a union strike without the picket signs. I wonder what those around us who expect this added care would do? Maybe, just maybe, they would turn the tables and start taking care of us?

Any thoughts or should I say advice on how to be less giving? I know--horrible suggestion on a Sunday morning, but I hate Sundays.

So Who's Maturbating These Days? Anyone?

OK, a very dear male friend of mine was invited to read and respond to our little platform here. After telling me he enjoyed the content (with the exception of the 2-inch Charlie insert--sounds personal) suggested some material for us to cover. So, I ask you my dear sex kittens to please elaborate and do it with your ever so explicit style....

My favorite time of the day to masturbate is mid afternoon. It generally occurs after sitting on my pretty little ass clicking away all morning and suddenly, out of nowhere---BAM! The urge hits me. To my dismay-Numnuts is at work and since he is the only one I am ALLOWED to let help me with my dilemma--her comes the tub! How on earth would a girl live without her tub? Rub a dub dub....if there were only three men in it.

Anyway, you all know it---it is really easy to do. Hand held, streamline, pulsator, whatever. Basically I am looking at 3 to 4 minutes, eyes closed, good graphics......problem/solution. But I have a confession to make....get ready....it is really sad....here it comes...."I am running out of f--king material. " Yes, I said it! I have used up all of the good stuff in my head so many times--I am out. What a shame--don't you agree? It is bad enough I am trying like hell to not fall prey to the "sheisgonnacheatonyou" disease--now I have to work harder for the ooohhh-aahhh -ooohh-I-love-me session.

And you?

Another Reason I Don't Want to be a Mother.....

As you all know--"I do not want children." One of these days I will take the time and provide 6 billion reasons why. Those of you who are mothers..good for you, but here is just one more reason why I will never sporn a designer purse snatcher---

I never want to say something so worthless as: "You have to love him--he's your brother!" Only a mother would say something so pathetic. I see that as: Because he is my brother is even more reason why I don't have to pretend to like him. Wouldn't want to be rude to strangers.

OK, sounds harsh but damn--what is it with mothers and their sons? Mothers are the reason we have f'd-up husbands and boyfriends. My mother (who I do like) would defend my brother if he were standing there holding the bag, in the bank, with a ski mask, yelling give me your f---ing money bitches! She would say it wasn't him. I swear.

I think this mother-son thing is something we really need to explore. If you are a mother with a son and you still have a chance at making him someone we do not complain about on a daily basis---please, please, please for the sake of the little perkies of the world--quit defending him and slap him upside his head.

*For the record, I do love my brother, but from a distance. He like so many other men I know screw up, have momma coddle them and then before you know it some other stupid woman is catering to his madness. Just pisses me off.

I am Woman Hear Me----Snore!

What happened to the enthusiatsic, free-spirited, mini skirt wearing, high heeled, I am gonna get laid tonight vixens that we used to be? And don't try and say that you never were this woman because if you weren't then you wouldn't be on this site.

Did someone knock on my door and tell me, "Hey Sun, just wanted to let you know that it is no longer acceptible for you to visually and mentally express yourself as a fierce sexual being." I don't recall that happening, nor do I remember the last time I put on a hot little number and thought, "I am going to turn some heads tonight."

I know the first response to this will be--because we are a bit older now. Who the hell made up that rule? I will tell you---our men and the other woman who are not secure enough in their own relationships to sit next to us in a bar when we are feeling our finest. And shame on me for complying with their inadequecies. I am not suggesting we all dress like two-bit-tramps, but damn ladies, if you got it going on (which you do) why in the hell DON'T WE FLAUNT IT?

I know that every one of you right now is saying: Oh she's crazy, my cellulite is horrible, I am too fat to do that, where am I suppossed to go all dressed up? Answer: I didn't say strut around in your bikini, we can buy clothes that fit right, and go out by yourself if you have to. I am the queen of that one.

Last week I took myself to NY. I spent three days searching for some great designer bargains and looking for...well--me.

What I found was a great Prada purse, some fab boots and small slice of me. The part I speak of that has been rediscovered is: I am and want to be sexy. I thank the beautiful ladies of NY for that. Everywhere I went there were hundreds of confident, beautifully clad women walking around in their thigh-high boots and leggin (all shapes and sizes). Every one of them looked stunning....and no they weren't all fashion models. Many were woman with strollers or simply walking to get their morning fix of Starbucks.

My point with all of this: "It is healthy to feel beautiful." Just because Numnuts doesn't notice anymore--it doesn't mean I don't have to notice anymore. Any thoughts?

If you have a few minutes for a laugh click on this link. She calls herself Charlene. Mindless humor has it's purpose......
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qebuo12efos

I Admit it: I Slept With a Married Man and Liked It!

Oh no---the forbidden fruit. In advance--let me state this clearly for my married gal pals and those who are judgemental.........

"I do not condone adultery and have not gone out of my way to be a part of someone else's adulteress attempts, but let's be realistic shit happens." sb

YES it happened...and YES I knew about it...YES it was exciting...would I recommend it....NO! Would I do it again...I might pretend for the thrill of it, but he would have to be exceptional.

I was quite a bit younger and "hormones a racin" and he was more than readily available. Let's face it, 36 years and happily not married--my numbers are up there and of course there are going to be at least one or two married ones in my bookworthy sexual experiences.

Anyone feel like fessing up?

My how the tables have turned.....

In the course of one full day (yesterday), I had three different women tell me that their husbands/boyfriends never want to have sex. Two of the three were married and these remarkable women (ages range from 30-54), all share the same disease--as I like to call it. They are committed to men who are either too tired, too grumpy, or just too damn stupid to take a few minutes and satisfy their women. I'll name it---"Sheisgonnacheatonyou" disease.

You might wonder how on earth I could have three different conversations like this in one day, but somehow--it finds me. Nevertheless, I being one who recently shares in their dreaded symptoms, can not believe what I am hearing and lately experiencing. For the record each of these women are full on committed to their relationships, but have considered a lover........the clock is ticking. Yes, everyone knows it is wrong, but this is the reality.

My father tells a story about his grandfather that is just charming. "Pops" as they called him was 69 when he had his last child. His beloved, some 20 years his junior had to beat him with a broom almost daily to keep him off her--seriously. Pops died at the age of 82 with a huge shit eating grin on his face. This was a happy man.

Has society turned our men into women? I have never been a fan of the woman who holds back sex from her man out of cruelty or says she is too tired all the time, but I am disgraced that these so-called men are denying their beautiful women their much needed romp! I have known some great male counterparts who have found comfort in another woman because of the lack of affections at home. I never condoned their actions, but sadly, I am starting to understand.

Gentlemen.....if you are reading this, drop what you are doing, go and find your mate, DO NOT SAY A WORD, and use what the good lord gave you. Beware of the day she stops asking you for it. Odds are--she has found a cure for this horrific new age disease.

OH MY GOD! I am his mother...........

I had a huge epiphany this morning! I am my man's mother.......please God help me.

Let me explain. Numnuts works likes there is no tomorrow. So, being the loving, good-natured "IF" woman I am, I make sure that he is well catered to. He does not ever want for food, clean clothing, cleanliness, warmth, I fix his boo-boo's, listen when he is angry, help him with his homework and pretty much take care of anything that goes wrong with him.

"I am his new mother"............yuck! I have no idea how that happened, but I do know that it may be the cause of our "lack" of excitement in the bedroom, or any other room for that matter. Oh, I guess I hadn't mentioned that yet. Yes, I of all people have fallen prey to the same old sex syndrome. Can you blame him? Who besides Freud wants to sleep with their mother? What have I done!!!!!!!!

Several years ago, I had a great conversation with my dear friend Vicky (sitting poolside at her million dollar condo-provided by her husband Tom) and mildly induced by a few glasses of wine among other things--proceeded to tell me in a slow, blue-blooded, southern draw......

"Girrrrl, I don't clean, I don't cook, no laundry, no grocery shoppin......nada damn thing for em!" Since I knew Vic and knew this statement to be 100% true I asked her simply, "How do you get away with it?" Vic, with a great mid-afternoon slur said, "He has one of two choices--either I do all that shit like his momma used to and never fuck em, or I fuck em. Plain and simple." She now lives in a 3 million dollar pad on Bald Head Island......still doesn't cook.

If I had only listened to Ms. Vicky!

*Had to use her actual words--you had to get the full effect.