TTYL8R, RU OK? UR MY BFF: Creating a Society of Morons!

Whoever invented text messaging should be shot! I think it is the number one cause of communication breakdown in our society. Over Christmas I got 6 "Merry Christmas" text messages. Nice gesture, but damn is it that hard to just pick up the phone and blurt it out for a whole 2 minutes? I think text messaging is a complete and utter cop-out and let's people excuse themselves from REAL communication. It basically says, "I have just thought about you for 30 seconds and I really don't want to talk to you, but hey it's the thought that counts--right?"

On Wednesday I took my niece and nephew to the mall. Yes, I know--brave and selfless. Anyhow, they both got new phones from Xmas and the entire ride there and for some of the duration of our visit-- there was the constant beep, beep, beep of incoming and outgoing text messages. I finally put a stop to it, but not once did these kids utter a word to their preteen mutants. It was ridiculous. God only knows that they were sending (probably Aunt Sunny has a fat ass) and if I were a parent there is no way my kids would be allowed to be sending these uncensored, unmonitored, God knows what--never ending-secretive-meaningless-misspelled-blurbs.

Sure let's help all the morons who can't spell as it is create their own language. That's what I would want for my child. No need to spell it properly or even feel as if you must speak, just send it in a text message--that's good enough. What the fuck is wrong with this world? Why are we allowing this ignorant form of laziness to surpass the necessary traditional means of conversation and communication?

I asked my niece if she ever goes over to her little girlfriends house and just hang out. This is exactly what she said, "Not too often Aunt Sunny, we just text." It made me sick. What happened to slumber parties and going to your "BFF's" house just to talk about the boys in school? I saw something on 20/20 last night that stated that more than 7 million people have clicked on the moronic site You Tube to watch this ugly little kid sing a song about chocolate, then this little monster got a commercial deal with Dr. Pepper and appeared on talk shows. It was absolutely ridiculous and if I were one of America's millions of enemies I would be doing just as they are.....LOL at what misfits we have become.

R U ABLE 2 TLK? I think so. Where is the sophistication? Where is the expression? Where is the passion in your voice and sincerity in your eyes? What if I am not telling the truth? Fuck it..no need, I'll send a text message.

Proud to be an American....NOT!

Well hello friends! I know it has been some time since I tapped my little fingers on the keyboard, but as with all of you--the holidays exhausted any free time. But, I am back and have a whole lot of new things to share so I hope you all will find the time to say hello and flatter me with your correspondence.

So, my thought for today is as follows: How in the world can people maintain professional jobs and be so damn incompetent? I had an appointment this morning with someone at 9 A.M. Having inherited my Italian grandmothers ridiculous 6th sense.....I decided to call said appointment host only to be told that he decided to take a few more days off and would not be returning to his PAID position until next Wednesday.

Since when can you just drop important-scheduled appointments and not bother to contact anyone? Don't bother calling me, I will just rearrange my whole day for this asshole so that he can sit on his fat ass at home a little while longer. This all runs in the same category with me about those who are late, those who completely suck at their jobs that we have to tolerate and my other biggest one--not getting what you pay for.

I ordered an online gift certificate for Numnuts at Boatersworld.com. Do you know these jerkoffs took my large amount of money (immediately) then claimed 3 times to have sent me what I ordered and then accused me of not being able to properly use my email. Now I am no genius, but one thing I do know is how to use this damn computer AND MY EMAIL! It was some little Asian guy who didn't even speak English telling me that it was my fault. I went berserk....

Needless to say, I called back the office where I had a scheduled meeting this morning and tore a new asshole in his supervisor making sure to state that I had lost valuable time and money because of his employees ignorance and negligence.....then I demanded my money back within 24 hours from Boatersworld.com and told them to find at least one person who might speak fucking English to deal with the public. I refuse to take this shit as a consumer and member of what is supposed to be a competent society. Do some research...this type of shit does not happen in other nations. This is a sloppy, American trait.

Everyone needs to watch the movie Sicko by Michael Moore. It clearly reiterates how screwed up our society really is. Americans are fat, lazy, selfish, ignorant and our government is intolerable. Many in our society do not deserve the freedom that we all take for granted. Watch the movie and you will see what I am talking about. We let our people starve and die of illnesses that can be prevented...how is this possible? I for one am 100% for socialized medicine.

Hillary Clinton tried for it years ago (and then got bought out)--maybe this round she can make it happen. Unless of course all of the fat, lazy, insured people would prefer a few more children go without care and let's not forget all of the hero's from 9/11 and our wounded soldiers who now wait for their demise because they have no health care. I could rant for hours on this one, but just watch the movie.....

So, how's everyone else doing today?

Fa la la la la............

(This is an actual picture of a Walmart store on Black Friday--scary, isn't it?)


My, my, my.....where have the days gone. It has been almost a week since I bitched about the Steelers. Now I get to decide if I want to give up on them this week or not---again!

So, what have all of my fine "IF" contributors been up too? Let me guess--scrambling around to get Christmas in order so that all of your hard work and efforts can be squashed within a matter of hours? Moving money around from here to there so it doesn't look like you have spent as much as you have? Making the plans on how in the world you see everyone in the short hours provided in the Christmas timeline? Scrambling to get the cards out even though we know everyone just opens them and says, "Oh that was nice."

If this is you--then we have something in common. I would love to revert back to the childhood excitement once in awhile. Do you remember lying in bed Christmas eve just praying that sleep will find you so that you can run downstairs in the morning to confirm that you have been a good girl/boy? That was the best!!!!

Do you remember where you were when you found out that Santa was really mom and dad who were dealing with all of this anxiety? I do. My brother ruined it for me. He dragged me out of my toasty warm bed and we crept down the stairs, peeked around the corner and saw the pseudo "Santa & Mrs. Claus" putting all the gifts that my father broke his back to provide--perfectly around the tree. I should have known at that point my brother would turn out so troublesome!

Anyway, in the midst of all of our madness to ensure a bright and cheerful holiday for those we love--I suggest we stop for a minute, close our eyes and get back that feeling of excitement, if just for a moment. I did it yesterday (while Darren and I were fighting over where to park at the mall) and it made for a better event!

We must keep in mind that millions around the world would kill for the luxuries of life that we so easily take for granted. As American consumers it seems our biggest concern during this time is deciding what digital picture frame has the best resolution and will Best Buy really get more Nintendo Wii's before xmas? The shame of it all..........

Stop, breath, and thank God.

Feminine Instinct.............

Thanks to the Pittsburgh Steelers inability to cover the spread that should have given them hope---my Christmas is canceled. See what happens when I have too much time on my hands! I really need to get out more and gambling should be illegal!

Just kidding--it is a lot of fun as long as you don't lose more than you have. I know many of you are big Steeler supporters, but I think I should have gone with my old ways of betting...

PICK THE BEST LOOKING QUARTERBACK! When I was a teenie-booper I would spend every Sunday at my Nonnies house watching and picking every game on the tube and eating the best damn sauce in the country! My uncle and I used to put our money where our mouth was and attack the NFL lineup: 2/3 team parlays, teasers, straight wagers, and my old favorite, "I'll take the points--love to support the underdog."

My strategy used to be designed around the color of their uniforms and the attractiveness of the quarterbacks. I used to win all the time. I loved the Dolphins (Danny Marino and that uniform made my car payment many a times). Now that I am older, I still enjoy the occasional dabble in the Sunday excitement, but I think I need to go back to my old ways.

So, Tom Brady (who is mighty fine) and the color blue (which I love) would have made me a big winner yesterday. This has also worked well with Brady Quinn (Notre Dame) in the past. Another fine example of why I need to follow my feminine instinct.

For the record---I know I am supposed to be a big "Steeler Supporter" but damn they play like a bunch of school girls sometimes. I don't care how good New England is supposed to be.....that was embarrassing.

Hardening of the Heart...

A very dear and respected male friend of mine has suggested a topic that I believe is affecting him--so it is our duty to see if we can give some positive insight. Since most of us can relate to this issue, I am sure all perspectives will be appreciated. So here it goes:


Why is it so difficult for us to open up and accept a potential new relationship after our hearts have been destroyed?


I will address this from my personal experience. I had a 5 years stint with someone for whom I would truly consider the love of my life. He was not all what I had dreamed of, but he was the only person that I feel I loved enough to have considered marriage and children with. Sadly, he was no where near mature enough or committed enough to make me pursue that direction, but I loved him immensely--still do.

After the end of the relationship which was trying throughout....I immediately put up my defenses and decided that no one would ever make me feel that way again. The feelings I speak of are unconditional love, fear, joy, resentment, excitement, jealousy, anger, betrayal, and unbridled sexual passion.

I was not young per say when this relationship ended...I was 31. When it finally did, I felt a tremendous loss and a lot of feelings of mistrust. I figured if these feeling could result with him, they may occur again and I would not let that happen. So for about 2 years I stayed as far away from any man that could potentially sway me to love again. I really didn't think I could ever fully regain those emotions---even though the one I had originally loved was so wrong for me. I didn't know that then...hell I just figured that out recently.

I did eventually establish a new relationship (the one I have now), but I do think the loss that I felt from my past love has rolled over to make me more aware of his faults and not as accepting. So, is Numnuts being punished because of my previous love. Maybe a little. It is not intentional, nor do I compare the two, but the amount of grief I felt when we parted was so much that I will never let anyone make me love them that much.

So..my advice to you my dear friend: Give it time, do not ask for more than you are willing to give, talk with her openly about your willingness to be patient, and make an effort to show your unique qualities. When a woman has fallen hard..it is something she will never forget. No matter how wonderful life becomes, if we gave our heart once--we can give it again, but it may have shrunk a little or now wears a protective coat, but it can and will be used once the fear has subsided.

If she is truly worth it to you...the time you have with her will be valuable. It may not be or ever be the full amount you want, but do not take it personally. New age women have decided that we can survive without being led by a man and many whose hearts have hardened have found it easier to just do without. I do not think that is the best recourse, but for some it may take years of self discovery and the eventual lonliness to kick in--but the odds are she will come around if you are worth it. And my friend you are worth it so just be patient.


Please share some of your experiences.....

Dear Sunday:

Thank you for your interest but, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. In other words, I don't have time nor do I care what you want from me. And I am too wrapped up in my own selfish age old needs to give a insanely driven, committed and potentially valuable team player like you an opportunity. I would rather sit here in my big cushy corner office and click and delete every email that comes from great women like you--who might actually think of me as a mentor. My how I love this country. As long as I stay white and old...I am good to go!

Oh how I love the world of technology. Our fabulous information highway has made it possible for people to crush one another without even muttering an actual word. The past few days I have received three different rejection emails. Two were from big PR companies I was attempting to work for and the final was from an online magazine I pulled my hair out to produce a ridiculous "How To" article that in my opinion was better than anything I have seen on their site. And no I am not being biased...it was too well written.

Ironically, I am surprised that I received any correspondence whatsoever. My point with this is how easy it has become for anyone to just squash another in a matter of seconds. Think about it---you can send an email that is of grave importance to you and within a matter of seconds the recipient can come back with a complete and utter shut down of your dreams or aspirations. Crazy.......

I think companies should be required to meet with every individual that has enough interest to even want to work for them. I am not saying that every Tom, Dick, and Rita that thinks they have a shot should be cordially invited to sit with the CEO, but if someone is qualified, educated, and aggressive enough to pursue you--then they should be able to pitch their intent face to face.

If I was a big gun at one of these firms--I would be curious about potential team players. My thoughts would be, "I wonder if this pain in the ass little shit can be molded and guided to make me more money." Simply rejecting people via email is a loss to our workforce and just another victory for "Old Whitey" as I call him who has sat at the helm far too long.

Am I pissed off that I keep getting rejected---sure am. Will it stop me from continuously pursuing what I know I deserve--no fucking way. What I will do once positioned where I feel I should be is make a valiant effort to let those who took 13 seconds of their lives to tell me no---why they should have taken 15 minutes to tell me yes. I am tired of the old white men ruling the universe....I really mean that.

I Forget Sometimes.....But Only For a Moment.

For all my southern friends...see what you are missing? I do love winter in the city!

Well, sorry for the piss poor mood yesterday, but hey we are all entitled to have one now and then. It is those who continuously have them that should consider medication. I am feeling pretty good this morning....I really do blame hormones for my mood swings. I wrote about it early on when I started this thing. It is the only aspect of being a woman that is dislike.

It is a beautiful morning here in the burg and the "snow is a fallen!" It really is a beautiful sight--unless you head out before the lazy ass salt crews. I can't help but think of all of the people who are effected when this type of weather sets in. I am snuggly warm, sitting at my pretty table next to my beautiful Xmas tree...snug as a bug.

But do you know how many families are sitting right now cold and unable to crank their furnaces to a sweet 72 degrees? A whole hell of a lot. It is times like this that I feel shameful that I have the nerve to complain. I suppose we all forget that once in a while. I am making it my mission to stop and reflect when I do my spoiled baby, oh poor me act. Like I said--it is the hormones. Maybe today we can each stop what we are doing and look at our surroundings and thank the man upstairs and those who share in our vast fortunes. I did.

So, when is the last time all of you fine dressed "IF" Crusaders went through your closets? With this cold weather creeping in.....I bet there are hundreds of great folks out there that would appreciate that sweater Aunt Barb got you 2 years ago. I am going to spent the early part of the afternoon putting together some bags of my privilege together in hopes of warming up a few people. Anyone care to join me? Today may be a good day to give back.

OH AND HEY JIMMY......YOU ARE GOING TO PASS. KEEP SAYING IT, OVER AND OVER. YOU ARE GOING TO PASS, YOU ARE GOING TO PASS--GET EXCITED! IT WILL WORK.

Beyond Disappointment.........

I am in a pissed off mood with nothing nice to say so I will heed the advice of my dead grandmother and keep my mouth shut. Anybody have anything funny or nice to say--please chime in and I will gladly respond. Yesterday sucked and for some reason it has rolled over to today and if I could blink my eyes and wake up anywhere else--I would.

How are you doing?

Jigsaw Puzzle

It seems that Life could be compared to a giant jigsaw puzzle
With each person like each piece
Having a place where they fit perfectly
Yet so many in there need to belong
Grab the first place they come to
Then try to make it fit
And because of this
They are never quite in harmony
With their adjoining pieces
Thus they never get to know
The way it was truly meant to be

Author unknown

My Holding Pattern....

It is Sunday morning and I woke at 5:23 A.M. Talk about someone with severely unused energy. The thing is when I rise my mind is racing and I sometimes overwhelm myself with enthusiasm only to be left.....waiting. I am writing this morning for me and I have a whole lot to say---so here goes.

I have been in a holding pattern for the past 3.5 years that is more snarled than any they have ever seen at NY's LaGaurdia. I have been on hold to unleash my talents, finally achieve the damn recognition I deserve and surpass any income that I have ever made. That my friends is a very tall order.

Let me explain---having moved back to the the place I swore at the age of 21 I would never see again was a very strategic and humble plan that has put me on this hold position that I speak of.

My life was wildly guided my me and me only. Instead of going into the boring (unless it's about you) history of my past...I will sum it up with this. I have never not had some sort of job or income since I was 15 years old. I also never once had to ask family, friends, or strangers for rent money or food. After the loss of my business (my own decision to crash by the way) I had a small stint with friends helping while I tried to figure out what the fuck happened and what the fuck now. It was much appreciated but caused more harm than any damn good. But I am grateful....in case you are reading.

The Pittsburgh move was not to be closer to my family...there I said it. The Pittsburgh move was a last resort, but a planned resort. I had always kept my drivers license in PA. I lived in California, Florida, NC with a PA residence...I never knew why I hadn't changed it and never really had thought anything about it. I figured out why in 2002. Must have been something subliminal.

When I left PA..I was enrolled in college, had a job with some high rolling lawyers making about $40,000 (under the table) and spent every day at 5 P.M. with a bunch of professionals drinking. Sounds pretty good for a 21 year old. It wasn't--I needed to be free to explore my potential---fuck structure and routine. So I dropped everything, and moved. Just like that no plan (didn't need one I knew how to work), left school, and picked a pretty little sunny, yet to explode state--NC. Knew no one there....I liked it that way.

I could go on and on about the next 12 years and a few states later. But I won't...we all have our history like I said. The point here is the drivers license. When I finally fell flat on my face after 12 years...no help....good money.....no money. That crazy notion that has always embedded in the back of my mind--What if? I came back to PA to get the education I proclaimed to have for the past 12 years. What did I just say? I claimed to have the education that everyone assumed I had.

Now why would everyone think that? I will tell you why. Because I am so fucking smart that school was and still is a complete and utter joke to me. Unless you put me in a quantitative (that means numbers folks) engineering situation that will smother the fuck out of the left side of the brain---I can learn it, do it, and explain it to someone else without any sweat. Truth is...it doesn't mean I am a genius or that I have fully mastered the craft at hand, but I can grasp it hard enough and long enough to ensure that others will believe I can and I will die trying to prove it.

That is a fucking art and one that I have yet to unleash. So back to PA. and why? Where else could I go to school as a resident (hence the drivers license) and pay $40,000 instead of $80,000. I am a resident--remember, always have been for some reason. The reason showed itself when the shit hit the fan. My family is here....maybe for once they could help, can go right back to where I left off at my old school, throw away all of the free to roam attitudes and lock myself up for a few years and get that God damn piece of people that stopped me dead in my tracks when I could no longer enjoy the lack of structure.

Hey Sunday, it does not matter how skilled you are--it does not matter how fucking smart you are or how much you love waking up at 5 A.M. or that you have never needed anyone's financial assistance in your life---or that you could help an enterprising firm make millions--today. You need your degree. Other than those wildly exciting entrepreneurs no one will accept you these days without that expensive (should have had 12 years ago)--I could have taught most of those classes myself---piece of---I am in a holding pattern fucking paper.

Whew that felt good. Yesterday I had the uncanny opportunity of meeting someone who could potentially make me a King. Yes, I said King, not Queen. I don't want to be a Queen they are second in command---I must be King. Ironically, I had just sent one of my (as you can imagine) explosive letters to his firm stating my excellence and intention. I had no idea I would be attending a luncheon where he would be speaking-coincidence? Truth be told I just need his firm to place me while I give another 20K for more education so I can really prove I am smart.....that is what the paper says. I think the paper says I have held back all of my potential for another 3 years and it makes me want to explode.

Now I have to play the entry level, willing to work 70 hours a week to show you I can do it, while I get another degree (cause I can), so that the real company I see myself ruling will even sneeze my way. I am reaching for big, big, power. Do any of you think like that? Or do you think settling for a JOB of 40-50K is acceptable? This man yesterday said something that made me want to work for him even more. He said, "People ask him all the time, Can I make money in PR?" He answered, "You can make money when you finally get the chance to do what you love--regardless." The bad part is...sometimes you have to wait to prove to everyone that what you love you can do better than most.

I am not sure what this rant is about--oh yes, my holding pattern. Do you know how frustrating it is for someone so personality type A--to wait for an opportunity? It is like someone is sitting on me while holding a pillow over my head and just giving me enough breath to make it for 3.5 years. Or putting a wild animal in a cage and telling it--just hang on big girl we'll have you out of here in a few years.

Have you ever made a list of great titles you know you could master with the right amount of immediate (a good mentor) guidance with continued and acquired experience. I have and it is wild. I am going to list them.....I really believe I can do all this shit.

I could be one of the best.....

Sports Agents
Professor (I strive for the likes of NYU, Columbia, some place like that)
Magazine Article Writer
Publicist (Big name stars or political figures---this is my dream job!)
Mother (my child would be so well rounded and motivated it would be sick)
Sports Commentator (sidelines) I wanted to do that before it was acceptable--imagine that.
Crisis Negotiator
Advertising Executive (I mean big commercials, not little brochures or piss ass news releases)
Senator (I am arrogant enough and actually care about public policy)
Political/Entertainment Spokesperson--I can spin it like nobodies business
Executive Assistant to a major CEO--I am talking Donald Trump, August Busch III, or Martha.

Guess what? Not only do I need a degree to get anywhere near these exhilarating careers--I better fucking know somebody. There is no way in hell to get any big wig job unless you can get someone to walk your ass in the door. And you better be willing and able to do everything and anything you are asked to do. If I could get a private list of where the people whose careers I want to master have happy hour---I could get the job. That is how the world is run and that is how it will remain.

OK, I am done now. Just needed to get that off my chest. I really don't expect any comments sometimes I just write to hear myself think.

sb